


blind date.

by softgay



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Blind Date, Coffee Shop, Dangerous Forks, Humor, M/M, Romantic Comedy, Trolling Tatsuya
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-03
Updated: 2013-03-03
Packaged: 2017-12-04 04:39:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/706651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softgay/pseuds/softgay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After realizing that his best bro is a lonely loser, Himuro arranges a blind date for Kagami against his will. He tried to matched him up with someone Kagami could relate to, but besides the red hair and their dislike for dogs, do they share anything in common at all?</p>
            </blockquote>





	blind date.

With smoldering eyes, Taiga glared at the coffee shop like it was a penitentiary, and the crumbled up scrap of paper that had the address was his death warrant. It was carelessly shoved into his coat pocket, where he hoped to forget it.

Not like he needed directions in the first place; he’s swung by here plenty of times for a quick cup and a muffin or two. Or ten.

The point was, Tatsuya was a conniving bastard who was gonna pay dearly for this. You see, he noticed how lonely Taiga seemed, living all by himself and working harder than anyone else. Being something of an older brother figure to Taiga since childhood, he felt he needed to remedy his depressing desolation, and fast. He was purely driven by concern when he came up with this brilliant idea.

**_“I swear to God, I will kill Tatsuya for this.”_ **

That, and perhaps he was also scheming for some amusement and scorn. Regardless, Taiga was in a position where he couldn’t cop out, or else face Tatsuya’s pitying grin and probably a condescending lecture. Oh, the lengths he would go for his pride. He’d be pissed off with himself if he weren’t so angry with Tatsuya.

“…That’s if I even survive this whole ordeal at all.”

Taiga deflates. He’s picking at his clothes, staring at the clock on his phone, messing with his hair once he sees his reflection. He thinks he looks stupid. His eyebrows are stupid. He lets out a heavy sigh. The truth is, he doesn’t remember the last time he went out to meet a complete stranger just to mingle and whatnot.

_Looks like I’ve got no choice but to appease to that smug jackass, and walk in. ‘sides, it’d be rude to just stand them up, wouldn’t it? Aw hell, what if I’m stood up? This is a waste of my fuckin’ time._

Taking a deep breath, he slowly makes his way across the street, approaching that precarious café.  This is it. For a place that usually looks so inviting and humble, he was paralyzed at the door.

_Alright, let’s just get this over with._

One step after another, it took a century for him to stumble in and settle with his surroundings. Panic was rushing through his veins like a river after a rainstorm. As if on auto-pilot, he dissolves into a random seat without really thinking about it.

His attention was on everything else. The coffee shop was alive and bustling with patrons. He never ever stepped a foot in here on days that were crowded, so all the throngs of people and the noise was a bit overwhelming.

Despite his height, he felt small and claustrophobic. Not wanting to catch anyone’s eye, he concentrates his gaze out the window, wishing he could just be outside of this hellhole that permeated pheromones.

Nervously thrumming his fingers upon the tabletop, Taiga tried to envision this mysterious person who would be joining him soon. Without knowing any details, he kept drawing a blank. How was he even going to know if it was really them or not? At this rate, he’d rather go home than find out.

_Well, whoever they are, they’re a no-show. Fine by me. I’m outta—_

Just as he was about leave, another hand tapped on the table, but just once. It was enough to inhibit his daze. Their voice was terse, yet pleasant. Golden shears sliced through Taiga’s velvety reverie.

“Pardon me, are you Kagami Taiga?”

“Yeah, but who wants to know?”

He was slender yet sinewy, and obviously carried himself well. While Taiga was slouching and not giving a damn, he had the perfect posture. There was an air of royalty about him. His hair was the color of crushed pomegranates, and it was probably the only thing that wasn’t particularly neat and dapper. His smooth skin looked as if he was hardly ever exposed to sunlight.

The one aspect that made Taiga do a double-take was actually a pair. He had striking heterochromic eyes, one gold and the other crimson.

Rolling those beautifully mismatched eyes, he smiled thinly at Taiga, before taking a seat on the other end.

“Well, me, of course. Who else?” He extended his hand to Taiga, still smiling. His eyes weren’t.

Taiga huffed, unimpressed, and gaped at the hand like it was a snake preparing to strike.

“Who are you and whaddya want?” Taiga grumbled. He had a bad feeling. A worse feeling.

The regal-looking-redhead chuckled reproachfully, letting his hand drop.

“I feared you’d be a little slow, but I see that’s an understatement. I’m Akashi Seijuuro.”

Taiga was blazing with heat, both from embarrassment and agitation. He slammed his fist down onto the hard marble, causing the silverware to clatter and startling the people around them.

“Like I give a rat’s ass—!!”

“But you asked.”

“That still doesn’t answer why you’re here, okay! If you’ve got no business with me, you better fuck off or it could get ugly, you punkass prince!”

Akashi gave a gentle laugh. It was quiet as it was brief. Suddenly, the rising sense of apprehension was amplified, and a fork was milliseconds away from being spiked into his forehead. Mere centimeters away.  It stuck out of the cushion like a silvery thumb.

“Wha-What the—?!”

A butter knife was at his neck. Akashi was almost just as close.

“My, my. Your reflexives are top-notch, as expected. Listen here and listen well, because I do in fact have business with you, Kagami-kun.”

The cold sharpness of the steel licked across Taiga’s throat, ever so lightly. Akashi caresses Taiga’s cheek, lightly still.

“Our date has just begun, and so far, you’re already earning a ton of demerits. What a shame.”

_“…No.”_

_No._

_No, you can’t be serious._

_Tatsuya has set me up with this guy?! Why?!_

_Concerned my ass, Tatsuya, you’re a sadistic fuck. Bro or not, this is too much._

_“_ Hah, a date, with a pompous psychopath like you? **_YEAH RIGHT!_** Not in a million years!!”

“Um, e-excuse me.”

A timid young waitress stood amidst the scene they were making. Taiga looked like he was about to rip through the roof and jump out, and Akashi was silently livid that a meek commoner girl would have the gall to interrupt.

“S-Sorry, but would you two like some coffee?” She gave a low whisper. “If neither of you are going to order anything, my manager asked me to send you out, so…”

Akashi relented and gracefully sat back down in his seat, scrutinizing the girl with icy indifference.

“Send us out, but why? What reason? Is your manager trying to lose his entire establishment in one fell swoop?”

“Uh…Well, I—he—“

“You’re paid a meager salary and by the hour, aren’t you? If you want to keep this lowly occupation of yours, I suggest you hold your tongue. Before I remove it.”

Taiga was dumbfounded, and couldn’t find the strength to speak another word, simply watching Akashi tear the girl to shreds. The girl was pretty much sniveling.

“And no, I do not want coffee. I’ll have tea, please. Kagami?”

“Erm…”

“Just give him coffee. Oh, and some cake. Now do your job and don’t trip.”

The sniveling waitress scribbled the orders down and created as much distance between her and Akashi as hastily as she could, bumping into several people, and nearly slipping over a spilled dish.

Akashi sighed and leant forward—Taiga tensed up—retrieving the fork he planted into the leathery chair. He twirled the utensil around, watching it shine.

“This is why a public place like this wouldn’t be my first choice. Take note of that.”

Taiga had no response, still stunned from the display he had just witnessed. He could hear the girl’s sobs from all the way in the kitchen. He cursed himself for not apologizing to her.

“For goodness sake, Kagami. Sit up straight, stop slouching! Like my nanny would say, you have thirty-three bones in your spine, use them.”

He growled in annoyance, yet found himself unconsciously sitting straighter than before. He was so unnerved and frazzled and _infuriated_ , he didn’t know what to do.

Akashi smirked, savoring Taiga’s change in demeanor. Taming a wild tiger might be easier than he thought.

“Looks like eons have come and gone, Kagami, because here we are. You and I.”

\--

Peace had been restored, and the coffee shop was emptying little by little, bringing about a much more relaxing environment. With less chatter, you could hear a soothing melody drifting along.

Akashi was stirring his cup of tea, blowing on the steam every so often before imbibing. Taiga barely touched his coffee, but was powerless against the cake and unable to refuse. However, after a few huge bites, he was now poking at it with disinterest.

“So, Kagami, do you keep any pets?”

“Huh? Nah, can’t at the apartment.”

“Oh. What do you think about dogs, though?”

Taiga squared Akashi with a sour look. He honestly couldn’t picture Akashi Seijuuro being careful with pets, let alone sweet with them. Especially dogs, for some reason. He could definitely see him training them ruthlessly, though. Just mentioning canines of any kind caused his skin to crawl, so he really wouldn’t be any better. He shook his head.

“Ugh, I’m not good with them…with dogs, I mean…”

Akashi had the ghost of a genuine smile across his face, almost as if he were glad and surprised by this.

“Well, that’s good to know. I don’t care for them much, either.”

Taiga’s jaw dropped, for he couldn’t believe they had finally found a common ground. Akashi continued, tilting his head to the side as he leaned on his elbow, studying Taiga’s expression.

“I am more of a cat person myself. Do you like cats, Kagami?”

Taiga shrugged and slumped in his seat, scratching the back of his neck absentmindedly.

“Uh, I don’t really have much of an opinion on them, except I think I’m allergic to them…”

Akashi grinned impishly as he took a sip of tea, looking very catlike himself.

“Oh well, you’ll need to get over it if you ever visit.”

Taiga gave a noncommittal grunt and gulped, glancing away. The more and more they talked, the more Akashi insinuated that he’d actually invite him over. He blushed and grimaced, thinking, _like I’d ever want to come and see you._

“Hey, are you going to eat that strawberry?” Akashi pointed to the bright red one that decorated his piece of cake.

He plucked it off and placed it in Akashi’s hand, their fingers sliding against each other for a moment.

“It’s all yours.”

And that ghost of a genuine smile returned, for a moment.


End file.
